Posts by Mister Biggs

Hey, plmkrzy...I don't know what the elders wives would think about Fredhall's date, but I am going to say that Fredhall appears to be much taller than his date!!! LOL!

22

JW Wedding Photos-21st Century Style!!!

by Mister Biggs in

"i pronounce you husband and wife.. you may now shake hands.".

"you say you're a sister and.

yet you are wearing a pant suit?!?".

"I pronounce you husband and wife.
You may now shake hands."
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"You say you're a sister and
yet you are wearing a Pant Suit?!?"
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"I know I'm going to be late getting
to the wedding, Henry, but I gotta make my
time this month...I'm Pioneering!"
---------------------------------------------

"Sister, please see me for
some private counsel after
the Reception!"
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"Hmm...I don't think this guest who
signed the Registry is a Witness. We can
talk to him and count our time!"
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The Bridemaids and their escorts
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Having fun at the Reception
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"Damn, baby! Not only do you have
a lot of junk in your trunk, you
also have a lot of mags in your
bag!"
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The hot and happening Band!
(They can only play Kingdom Melodies
at Reception's nowadays!) :o)
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The Elders Wive's arriving to the Cermony
---------------------------------------------

Even Fredhall got invited to
this wedding!

---------------------------------------------

20

CourtTV - A JW Case

by Mister Biggs in

last night (9:30pm est), courttv did a story of a woman who left home when she was a teenager.. she got involved with drugs and prostitution.. she soon gave birth to a child.. she stopped using drugs and quit being a prostitute and took up a job as a waitress.. she now gave birth to a son.. fast forward six years.... she began studying with jehovah's witnesses.. she was applying for something (maybe welfare, i'm not sure.

i ran to use the bathroom during the commercials and when i came back out the narrator had already said what she was trying to apply for).. the narrator said that whatever she was applying for required that she disclose who the father is and explain why she is not collecting child support.. the father of her son was a married police officer who had an established family and a distinguished career.. she consulted the elders as to what she should do.

they told her that she needs to be honest and that she shouldn't lie on the application.. so, she set up a meeting with the baby's daddy (the cop).

Mister Biggs

You think so, Panda?
It looked like he was in a church.
However, he had a tie on. Maybe you're right.

16

Questions From Readers-Complete Immersion?

by Mister Biggs in

must one get baptized (complete immersion) no matter how severe their handicap?.

(paragraph 2, sentence 3..."since baptism by complete immersion is a scriptural requirement, humans have no authority to exempt someone from baptism.".

my thoughts: what elder/co/do will dare take a risk in exempting one from baptism if they have been told by the society that no human has the authority to do this?

Mister Biggs

I just thought of some of the "risks" involved...
In addition to drowning or paralysis, there are:

1) The risk of eventually getting Disfellowshipped (Elder: "Johnny, I know you're comatose right now, but I know you can still hear me. You haven't done any preaching since your vegetative state. We have no choice but to disfellowship you because of your actions!")

2) Shepherding Calls (Elder: "Well, Ethel, it's always nice to see you. I don't know how you have survived all those years confined in that Iron Lung machine. Oh...By the way, we had a congregation picnic last week. We were running and playing and swimming. Too bad you couldn't make it...")

3) ????

16

Questions From Readers-Complete Immersion?

by Mister Biggs in

must one get baptized (complete immersion) no matter how severe their handicap?.

(paragraph 2, sentence 3..."since baptism by complete immersion is a scriptural requirement, humans have no authority to exempt someone from baptism.".

my thoughts: what elder/co/do will dare take a risk in exempting one from baptism if they have been told by the society that no human has the authority to do this?

Mister Biggs

Ah, Scully, you are hilarious but RIGHT ON!

Now that I know you're a nurse I'll look you up the next time I need some medical advice. ;o)

20

CourtTV - A JW Case

by Mister Biggs in

last night (9:30pm est), courttv did a story of a woman who left home when she was a teenager.. she got involved with drugs and prostitution.. she soon gave birth to a child.. she stopped using drugs and quit being a prostitute and took up a job as a waitress.. she now gave birth to a son.. fast forward six years.... she began studying with jehovah's witnesses.. she was applying for something (maybe welfare, i'm not sure.

i ran to use the bathroom during the commercials and when i came back out the narrator had already said what she was trying to apply for).. the narrator said that whatever she was applying for required that she disclose who the father is and explain why she is not collecting child support.. the father of her son was a married police officer who had an established family and a distinguished career.. she consulted the elders as to what she should do.

they told her that she needs to be honest and that she shouldn't lie on the application.. so, she set up a meeting with the baby's daddy (the cop).

Mister Biggs

Unfortunately, dungbeetle, they almost never give updates about the survivors on these types of shows.

16

Questions From Readers-Complete Immersion?

by Mister Biggs in

must one get baptized (complete immersion) no matter how severe their handicap?.

(paragraph 2, sentence 3..."since baptism by complete immersion is a scriptural requirement, humans have no authority to exempt someone from baptism.".

my thoughts: what elder/co/do will dare take a risk in exempting one from baptism if they have been told by the society that no human has the authority to do this?

Mister Biggs

LOL @ The Rev!

Also, LOL @ the zev!

16

Questions From Readers-Complete Immersion?

by Mister Biggs in

must one get baptized (complete immersion) no matter how severe their handicap?.

(paragraph 2, sentence 3..."since baptism by complete immersion is a scriptural requirement, humans have no authority to exempt someone from baptism.".

my thoughts: what elder/co/do will dare take a risk in exempting one from baptism if they have been told by the society that no human has the authority to do this?

Mister Biggs

Must one get baptized (complete immersion) no matter how severe their handicap?
(Paragraph 2, Sentence 3..."Since baptism by complete immersion is a Scriptural requirement, humans have no authority to exempt someone from baptism."
My Thoughts: What elder/CO/DO will dare take a risk in exempting one from baptism if they have been told by the Society that no human has the authority to do this? So...no matter how severe the handicap is, you MUST get baptized in complete immersion.

Society: "Actually, Mr. Biggs, even though we said that, that's not exactly what we mean. Please read the final paragraph and the second to the last sentence..."

However, when special care or precautions are taken, in ALMOST ALL CASES, baptisms can be performed.

"So, Mr. Biggshot, we say you must get baptized regardless of your handicap but technically you don't have to. In other words, when someone with an iron lung or someone who has flesh-eating disease wants to become a dedicated servant of Jehovah, they will be referred to this wonderful, spirit-directed 6/1/2002 Watchtower. They will think to themselves, 'Self...If someone with a hole in their throat can get baptized, what prevents me from doing so?' However, there may be some new handicap that may one day develop. That's why we say 'in almost all cases'..."

Biggs: "But, what happens if, even after taking all the precautions (like, having a doctor or nurse standing near the pool) the baptismal candidate becomes more handicapped or dies as a result of a mishap? Will you (Society) bear any responsibility? Also, will you pay the doctor or the nurse to take the time from their busy schedule to oversee the baptism?"

Society: "We can answer those questions. Hopefully, the handicapped baptismal candidate has medical insurance. Maybe that will cover the expense. Even the local congregation may be willing to chip in. Just don't ask to touch our million$ up here in Brooklyn. Oh, yeah, and to answer your question as to whether or not we bear any responsibility due to the result of an unfortunate mishap...well...we've covered our arses. Just read the last sentence of the last paragraph..."

Therefore, every reasonable effort should be made to baptize a person in water if this is the individual's sincere desire and IF HE WISHES TO ACCEPT THE RISKS INVOLVED

Sigh....You gotta love their double-talk and legal maneuvers!